Someone Crying for Help

I don't really like my neighborhood.  At first I was enamoured of it because it was so different than where I had lived before, and I found the people so interesting...and in some cases, scary.  So strange.

Now, I am sick of how ugly it is--people throw trash around, littering.  People pave their garden space in front of their homes.  The culture is very loud.  The people down the street who used to have loud parties until 4am frequently have finally moved away.  My neighbor was happy about that.  The end of an era, she said.  Don't know where they're going, and don't care.

People I thought were just being friendly ask me for jobs around the house, or in the yard.  I don't have the money to pay them.  Sob stories on my porch--"For my granddaughter's birthday..."  Good lord.  When I lived off of Piedmont Avenue, that was the constant line from one beggar, "Trying to get some money for my grandkids."  She lives in a nice house off Piedmont Avenue, and apparently enough people give her money (white guilt) that she does quite well.

And then there is the yelling.  I hear some of the most disturbing things at night.  One night one of my neighbors was having a fight with a very dirty-mouthed, disrespectful man who was wantonly tossing the term, "dirty bitch" around in a menacing way.   It was like the dialog from a bad television show.  Not what I want to hear outside my bedroom window.

The loud party neighbors (the house across the street is also loud, but generally not as late or as frequently--the guy has the weirdest laugh that echos around the porch) had women yelling for an hour sometimes, fighting with someone.   And sometimes they would shout Help or something, but it wasn't serious.  Or was it?  It is impossible to tell.

I can't tell when someone needs help.  And I feel a strong sense that if I interfered in any way, in any of these things, there would be retribution for meddling, or something.  Breaking into my house, hurting the dogs...that type of thing.

Our letter carrier doesn't shut the mailbox.

Anyway, the other night I heard two people talking loudly at 2am on the street, and I heard the woman saying, "No no no no."  and then "Someone please help me!".  She only said it once.  And I wasn't sure if it was a real request since there is so much shouting and yelling around here.  Looking back, I wish I'd called the police, but it stopped soon after that.  My initial reaction is to go out and help a person, but if it is a dangerous situation, that puts me in danger.

And,  I am wondering if my neighbor I used to talk to a lot was involved.  It was in front of his house.

What do you do?
Well, I want to move.  

I want to live in a pretty area with greenery, with trees, and places to walk.   Where I can go outside and help someone who is asking for help, where I know a request for help is genuine, and would be appreciated.

Making Art. Why are you telling me to look at someone else's?

Why do people keep insisting I look at other artists work?  Really I am not that interested in seeing other people's work when I am creating something myself.  The same with writing.  I will write in my own style. I don't need to read other books to see how I want to write!  Gah!   I realize people like to relate things to things.  Having something come out of the blue is unnerving.  ?   I'm reading my American Art History book right now, and the author is constantly saying "So & so must have been influenced by so & so because look at this painting."  That is fine except the author is presenting no evidence that this painter *was* influenced by whoever else.  It's fine when they are, but assuming they have been influenced when there is no evidence for such doesn't make sense to me.  Here is why.  In the sciences, it is a known phenomenon that sometimes several people come up with a similar discoveriy at around the same time.  It is as if the world thinking has gotten to a point where that discovery is going to be made.  All signs point to this, and so forth.  An example of this is the discovery of the Calculus by Leibnez & Newton.  

So why would this be any different with artistic styles?  It was coming.   

And.   I have a teacher who just told me "Art is like that.  It's a constant struggle."  And I disagree.  I had never had that issue until I started doing a project in her cllass, and nascent ideas were critiqued and corrected before they were executed.  Which is not the best way to support the creative process.  It was so frustrating for me....like a kind of torture.  I have an idea in my mind, and I know from experience that it will work itself out in the medium I am using...and it is constantly being interrupted by corrections before it is formed.

  I spoke about it and the instructor backed off some, which I appreciate.   Is this insistence to look at other people's artwork a lack of creativity?  Like I am supposed to be getting ideas from these other peple?   I fully believe in following the flow of my vision, have teh idea or dream, that inspiration, and mke it, impulse to action.  It's simple, and I love it.  It's exhilarating to make art this way.  I don't need external reference or early feedback.  I don't need to see what other people are doing (which to me is part of the "art kissing its own ass" problem in the artworld, and hollywood--"Oh my god!  An IDEA!").

I have my inspiration, I have my idea, and that is what I do (particularly with installations)  Or in the case of clay or drawing, I have a strong emotion and sometimes an image, and that is what my hands make.  Something appears in the clay, and that is what I make.  I don't know what it will look like beforehand unless I am doing an exercise for a class; even then I am often surprised.  And that is part of the joy of doing the work.  So why are you sending me off of my internal vision (which is influenced by many things in the world), to look at others?  It doesn't make any sense.

Making Art. Why are you telling me to look at someone else's?

Why do people keep insisting I look at other artists work?  Really I am not that interested in seeing other people's work when I am creating something myself.  The same with writing.  I will write in my own style. I don't need to read other books to see how I want to write!  Gah!   I realize people like to relate things to things.  Having something come out of the blue is unnerving.  ?   I'm reading my American Art History book right now, and the author is constantly saying "So & so must have been influenced by so & so because look at this painting."  That is fine except the author is presenting no evidence that this painter *was* influenced by whoever else.  It's fine when they are, but assuming they have been influenced when there is no evidence for such doesn't make sense to me.  Here is why.  In the sciences, it is a known phenomenon that sometimes several people come up with a similar discoveriy at around the same time.  It is as if the world thinking has gotten to a point where that discovery is going to be made.  All signs point to this, and so forth.  An example of this is the discovery of the Calculus by Leibnez & Newton.  

So why would this be any different with artistic styles?  It was coming.   

And.   I have a teacher who just told me "Art is like that.  It's a constant struggle."  And I disagree.  I had never had that issue until I started doing a project in her cllass, and nascent ideas were critiqued and corrected before they were executed.  Which is not the best way to support the creative process.  It was so frustrating for me....like a kind of torture.  I have an idea in my mind, and I know from experience that it will work itself out in the medium I am using...and it is constantly being interrupted by corrections before it is formed.

  I spoke about it and the instructor backed off some, which I appreciate.   Is this insistence to look at other people's artwork a lack of creativity?  Like I am supposed to be getting ideas from these other peple?   I fully believe in following the flow of my vision, have teh idea or dream, that inspiration, and mke it, impulse to action.  It's simple, and I love it.  It's exhilarating to make art this way.  I don't need external reference or early feedback.  I don't need to see what other people are doing (which to me is part of the "art kissing its own ass" problem in the artworld, and hollywood--"Oh my god!  An IDEA!").

I have my inspiration, I have my idea, and that is what I do (particularly with installations)  Or in the case of clay or drawing, I have a strong emotion and sometimes an image, and that is what my hands make.  Something appears in the clay, and that is what I make.  I don't know what it will look like beforehand unless I am doing an exercise for a class; even then I am often surprised.  And that is part of the joy of doing the work.  So why are you sending me off of my internal vision (which is influenced by many things in the world), to look at others?  It doesn't make any sense.

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I like this one, especially the center figure gesture.

Anya Sophe Behn, Aliencranberry Arts

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The three so far....
Anya Sophe Behn, Aliencranberry Arts

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#0
Anya Sophe Behn, Aliencranberry Arts

SF Open Studios 2010 at Fort Mason

Ah, it was great for me!   Some people who love art came to the Fort Mason Open Studios, and it is always nice for artists to see and hear from people who love art.

 

I got some really great feedback and insight (people's perspective and opinions) about some of my work.  The wire mesh heads were particularly popular.  People tended to make a beeline right to them.  It was fascinating.

 

There were several people who purchased the wire mesh heads.  One in particular has an *amazing* art collection at his house, and I was flattered that my work was added to it.  (I delivered the head & got to see some of the beautiful work in his home.)

 

The opening evening party was fun & my little wire figures...hmm let me see if there is a photo....were purchased right away!  And I have a commission for a wire figure I am working on right now--the same person would like it to be in his eyeglasses shop.  And move around.  *Awesome*

Photos from the Fort Mason Show (SF Open Studios 2010)

See and download the full gallery on posterous

heads

mwhahahah!

Coffee Shop Expressions

Sometimes the expressions of people at a coffee shop are kinda funny...People intensely working while jacked up on too much coffee--which makes you  more distracted than usual.

  (I didn't realize what a scene it is at Philz Coffee in Berkeley in the evening.)

  Face screwed up, intently looking at papers....OOOOH.  workin' hard.

This happened with me a couple weeks ago.  I was trying to finish a freakin' paper, and I kept drinking coffee...and I don't know that it helped me to focus, because it took me much longer than usual to finish it.  I don't know if it was just the coffee or trying to figure out which information to cull, because I had done a lot of research, but it didn't flow like I was used to.

  This could also do with the disruption of my mind from the migraine medication.  Butterbur extract was so much less affective than the topamirate (which turned out to help me not at all), but it still disrupted my cognitive function and ability to write.  ...I wonder if I am slightly ADHD.  I was listening to teenagers talk about it, and ...oh, pretty!  look, sparkley!

  Anyway, someone (my neurologist?) said, "I don't know if you're normally this hyper," which was funny to me because I don't usually think of myself as hyperactive.  However, after listening to the teens talk about being ADHD, I think there is a little bit there.   Keeping tabs on it.

  I'm going to write more about migraines.  I started to while I was taking the topamirate, and I could not write anymore!  It is something I no longer take for granted.

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Anya Sophe Behn, Aliencranberry Arts